Friday, 24 September 2010

Boden man, Toast man and the Boast catalogue

These two catalogues arrived at my parents' house recently, raising the question: "Alex, what sort of gentleman could win your heart?"


Boden man, with your giant pretzels and coffee and your smug tennis, riding rough-shod over public bridges straddled by blonde women…

… Toast?

Toast man with your derelict abode, unkempt hair, romantic far-away stare and probable suicidal tendencies…

Toast Man or Boden Man? My heart cannot decide.

I conclude, there is a dearth of healthy masculine role-models for the image-conscious man.

Being more pro-active in general than Toast's moping models, I rode my bike to the beach recently. Tourist season is over. The Isle's tourist hotspots are desolate and distressed, so probably quite fashionable. I found an old, abandoned swimming pool, by an empty shoreline and present… *fanfare*

The 'Boast' catalogue

For a 'washed up seaweed' look that remains vivacious - try purple.

Rust can add a splash of warmth to an aging complexion.

For a fully rounded look, add pebbles…

Haircuts (all haircuts) are out this season.


  1. Tee hee hee,

    Suicidal tendencies *giggle*

    Giant pretzels are a symbol of virility.

    Riding a bicycle without using hands to manipulate the handlebars, now that is manly daring *swooooon*

  2. Ha ha! I think if Tennyson were alive today he'd have maybe got a Toast cardi for Christmas.

  3. The Boden guys need to tell the Toast guys whatever joke it was that made them laugh all damn day. Must have been a belter.